Writers may have a whole story mapped out, right down the ending, but they’ll stare at a blinking cursor for an hour trying to figure out the first word. Or halfway through, the fear of not being good enough threatens to shut down the whole project. I know the feeling all too well as I’m always striving to do the best I can and it’s hard to shake the doubt bubble that floats right over my head. While the doubt never completely goes away, I have learned there are ways to work past it.
Part of bypassing the all-present doubt bubble has to do with letting go of fear. Almost every writer I know battles with the fear of writing a less than perfect piece. For some, this fixation on perfection prevents the completion of a final draft. I’ll be the first to admit, I often get stuck reading over a draft multiple times before I get around to writing anything new. Instead of paying attention to what resides in my imagination, I’m focusing on restructuring sentences and questioning my comma usage. Its a vicious cycle that leads to a number of partial drafts and very few final drafts.
An exercise in Wreck This Journal helped put this all in perspective as it reminded me that making a creative mess is where freedom and progress begin. The page gives instructions to make a mess and clean it up, so that’s what I did! My trusty crayons and markers gave me everything I needed as I made one page an absolute mess of scribbles and wayward coloring and the other page a of model neatness with straight lines and smooth coloring strokes. I used the same colors so it would look like I took the left hand side and ironed it until it looked like the right hand side. The neatnik in me rejoiced!
The concept of this page is so simple, but it reaches so much deeper to a writer trapped by a doubt bubble. As I sat coloring, I thought about how I have to be fearless when it comes to the first draft, (maybe even the second or third!). Its okay to make mess with horrible grammar and spelling. It’s to be expected that characters won’t turn out right the first time. Every story needs to play out a few different ways before it finds the right groove. I have to keep reminding myself that whatever I’m writing is going to be a disaster and that’s okay! The iron is never far away, but it’s important to keep it out of reach for a little while. If I spend all my time fussing over creating the perfect manuscript the first time around, the doubt bubble will win. I owe it to my work and to my muse to let go of the fear.
Every mess can be straightened up . . . eventually. All it takes is a little patience and a bold attitude to make that mess in the first place. Resist the urge to be perfect and just write!
c.b. 2012
the challenge is in the blank pages. nice blog!
I call it Blank Page Syndrome!
Thank you for reading!
Great advice! that’s what I tried to do when taking part in National Novel Writing Month – just get the words down, and worry about tidying them up later. Of course, now I have a gigantic mess of a “novel” to attempt to wrangle into shape, but still – that’s more than I had a year ago!
While I’ve never participated in NaNoWriMo, the philosophy behind is phenomenal! It really is amazing to walk away from the process with so much more than what you started with! Good luck with your revising!
Are you SURE we’re not the same person??? Like you, I keep reminding myself that it’s not over until it’s over…there’s always time to work things out. The sentiment never stops me from worrying, fretting, getting the miseries, but it is a true thing. I do, however, go back a page or two to go forward: It’s a kind of immersion exercise to bring me fully into the “here” of the page in progress. It helps. Thanks for another wonderful post. And I do so love your crossovers from the visual expression to the verbal one!!!
-Lynn
I don’t think its ever really over! Even when I have a “final” draft, I still find something I want to change (I really have to stop doing that!).
With my second novel, I’ve been a lot better with just writing instead of constantly backtracking. Though I do catch myself reading every once in a while.
I have always claimed to be the “Queen of the First Draft” in my writing. I write small marketing pieces and sometimes you just have to begin—and sometimes the first draft isn’t all that bad.
Blogging has really taught me how to jump in and write without over thinking. In order to keep a posting schedule, I had to learn to let go a lot faster!
Thanks for reading!
My harp teacher said something that helps me move past doubt and fear: “You don’t have to play perfectly to be worthy to play.” I think it works for writing as well: You don’t have to write perfectly to be worthy to write. Do leave the iron turned off for a while – sometimes the wrinkles are the best part of the design. It’s where the life is. – Janet
That’s good advice!
It seems the very best writers are the ones who break the rules or do something that strays from the “right way” to tell a story. That got me thinking that if I focus all my energy on making something perfect, I could lose my original voice.
One of the things I find most interesting about your Wreck This Journal pages is that I feel like I’m watching you grow as a writer. I feel like every time you post about a page and the lessons you’ve learned, you’re one step closer to being a writer that will one day be published. Something that you do, which I don’t know if a lot of writers do (though of course I’m no expert) is to really pay attention to how you feel about writing itself. You notice a barrier and you root away at it until you take a lesson from it and knock it down. It’s fascinating to see writing from this side!
Great post, as always!
M.
Self reflection is key in just about everything, so it makes sense to apply it to writing too! I hope one day it will lead to my name in print, but its still valuable to the craft nonetheless.
I’m so glad you are following me on my journey. Your encouraging words are so appreciated!
When I read this, I’m once again reminded of how thankful I am that I never got any ideas of becoming a writer. I’m a consumer, and all you guys out there are doing a great job.
My favourite author right now is Nicholas Sparks, and he just announced yesterday on this Facebook page that he’s started a new novel. That is good … I have something to look forward to, just finished the one he released in Oct.
I really love how you cleaned up that mess! Beautiful!!!
Thanks!
I’m always amazed by writers like Sparks that can write so much!
yes, just write. Sometimes when I get stuck, i start my page with “I don’t want to write about…” and see what follows. Of course, I’m not a fiction writer so don’t know how this work in that world….
I use this method with fiction writing all the time. It keeps the page from staying empty and gets my brain going!
I love your anology of the bubble. Kind of reminds me of Eeyore’s dark cloud.
I believe the greatest writing comes from the messes because we go deeper into ourselves when we aren’t editing too.Great post and thoughts.
That’s what I love about WIG! Every week, I have to write within a time limit that gives me no time to edit or backtrack. I’m more honest, less inhibited, and the truth always comes out.
Another great post! My inner critic has been giving me H_ _ _ this week and I can’t get a strong footing on anything. Sometimes it’s about not having time to focus and feeling frustrated.
Absolutely. This time of year in particular makes it difficult to stay focused on anything! The mad rush of the holidays and then the sudden silence of the aftermath is quite jarring. Give yourself some time to adjust and I’m sure you’ll find solid ground again.
Tell your inner critic to zip it!!!
What a GREAT interpretation of this page – and a great reflection on the writing process. For me, I think the mess is more in my head…as if it has to be a perfect idea before I start the writing. What’s the point of writing at all, says my inner critic, if it’s not going anywhere? Damn inner critic!
Yes – damn that inner critic!
Ideas are always a mess in my head, too, and I think that’s where my novel notebooks came from. I just let the mess fall out of my head and into the pages of my notebook. The disaster was horrific, but ultimately I cleaned up the mess and got a novel out of it, (there were multiple messy drafts, too!).
I totally know what you’re talking about. When I start writing something new, I read over it and delete – thinking I can do better. Pretty soon I’m back where I started – with nothing! Good advice in the post, thanks for sharing.
We are two peas in a pod. Both of us need to figure out how to disable that delete button and just keep writing!
Great thought this one,
thanks,
Jim
I hope it inspires you!
Thanks for reading.
Thank you for such good advice!
You bet! One of these days, I’ll get a little better at following it!
I always love your Wreck This Journal blogs! This one rings especially true to me, because I always get paralyzed by that “must get it right the first time” diseased logic when the beauty of writing is being able to rewrite
Diseased logic is right!! I struggled with it today and I had to keep reminding myself to let go and just write. In order to rewrite, you have to write first!! When I thought of my scribbles, the first draft came flying out.
Just Write – these are my two little words for 2012! I loved this post, and your drawings in the journal are exactly what I’m working on this year too. I like the idea of knowing the “iron” is not far away, and I can let things be as wrinkled as needed until my drafts are finished. Thanks for the smiles today – it’s always so nice to read your blog and know I’m not alone.
You are definitely not alone! I’m so glad to have friends and fellow writers who struggle with the same things. Together we can help each other pop the doubt bubble.