The Lost Art Of Coffee House Etiquette

As a writer, I spend a lot of time in coffee houses. Tall Café Mochas serve as my muse juice, free internet keeps me connected, and the cozy atmosphere is free of irritating distractions. Although, I’m starting to question the integrity of that last part. My usual writing spot has increasingly become more a like a zoo than a civilized place for people to read, drink coffee, or engage in conversation.

Of late, I’m starting to think there is a shortage of people who truly know how to behave in a coffee house. I’ve been an avid coffee house dweller for many years and I’ve covered a lot of ground both in the States and abroad. Either I’m getting old and less tolerant or there has been a steady degradation in acceptable behavior for what used to be a relaxing public space.

Ranting usually isn’t my style, but sometimes I hit my limit and can no longer remain silent. At the same time, I’m an organized and civilized ranter that decided to create a list of rules that I believe are essential to coffee house etiquette.

Five Simple Rules of Coffee House Etiquette

The Globe (bookshop and coffee house), Prague Czech Republic
Photo by: c.b.w. 2008

1) Wait in line patiently.

A coffee house is not the place to go if you are in a hurry. Hit the Starbucks drive-thru or a fast food joint if you want your coffee in one minute flat. Standing a millimeter away from the person in front of you and guffawing about how long it’s taking for the lone barista to make a latte does not create a comfortable atmosphere, nor does it make your coffee appear any faster. Good coffee is worth the wait, anyway.

2) Keep conversations personal.

A quiet coffee shop is always nice, but the energy of socializing is acceptable as well. However, there is a difference between intimate conversations that stay within the confines of personal space and those that spread out to everyone within earshot and beyond. Obnoxious drabble and attention-seeking hollers have no place in a coffee house. It’s about showing a little respect for yourself and those around you who did not ask for a shot of your personal life with their espresso.

3) Keep electronic devices silent.

In the age of technology, we are increasingly dependent on cell phones, laptops, tablets, and music players. I fully admit that I am a gadget junkie, but I’m also aware of the fact that it’s polite to make sure they don’t disrupt others. In a coffee house, there is no reason to listen to music or watch a movie with the speakers blaring for everyone to hear. Earbuds were created so you and only you can listen to whatever you want anywhere you want without disrupting other people. Use them.

The same goes for cell phones. Take the time to put your phone on silent or vibrate. Most coffee house goers are not amused that your ringtone sounds like the latest dance club mix. Furthermore, if you have to answer the call, do so following Rule #2 or take the call outside. For some reason, people talk on the phone with a voice that is considerably louder than when speaking face to face to another person.  Nobody wants to hear half of a conversation that breaks the sound barrier while trying to enjoy a cup of coffee.

4) Don’t leave children unattended.

I tread lightly with this rule because I know kids have a right to be out in public. All I’m saying is a little on-site training in proper behavior wouldn’t hurt. Perhaps I’m a prude who is way out of line, but I personally don’t go to a coffee house to listen to children scream or teenagers test how many times they can use the F-word before their Venti Chai Tea is gone. Too many times I’ve watched a gaggle of twelve-year-olds commandeer a table with their “grown up” drinks without having the slightest idea on how to conduct themselves.  So, instead of a coffee house they decide they’re on the playground. Maybe it would help to have someone show them some etiquette instead of dumping them off at a café like it’s a sort of babysitting service.

(Sorry, I might be ranting a little too much here. Parents can’t totally be blamed for this as children are going to do things beyond Mom and Dad’s control. However, Society as a whole can help by refusing to accept inappropriate behavior.)

 5) Clean up after yourself.

Coffee houses are not the same as restaurants. They don’t have waiters assigned to certain tables to come and take your order and clean up your dirty dishes. Granted in some coffee houses, there is someone who swoops by to clear the table, but more often than not the dishes sit there until the barista has a second to step away from the coffee bar. Is it part of their job? Yes. But consider the fact that someone who has just walked in needs a place to sit. Would you ask them to sit with your dirty dishes? I hope not. It only takes a few seconds to throw away your paper cup or set a plate on the counter.

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I may be perched on a soapbox at the moment, but I’m not above apologizing for having broken at least three of these rules at one time or another in my early years.  After more than a few cups of coffee, I’ve learned how important it is to respect the space of others and be mindful of the reality that I am not the center of the universe and neither is anyone else. Especially, in a coffee house.

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c.b.w. 2013

Memory Stubs

When I was a kid I saved ticket stubs from concerts, sporting events, fairs, festivals, and just about anything else that needed a ticket. I loved how one look at a date and time, seat number, or movie title instantly took me back to that moment in time. Memories that were normally invisible in the back of my mind came roaring to life as I thought back on who I was with, where I sat, and how much fun I had. Each ticket stub was my own personal time machine.

While searching for film negatives in box under the bed, I came across a stack of memories I thought were gone forever. When my home was burglarized eight years ago, all my so-called valuable possessions were taken, but what killed me the most was the loss of a lockbox that I used to protect keepsakes including tickets stubs.  In particular, I was sad to lose a set Star Wars 20th Anniversary stubs, (my step-dad and I saw those movies together and I’ve always treasured that time).  Imagine my surprise, when I flipped open a small box and found a stack of movie and concert ticket stubs I thought were in my stolen lockbox.

Movie Ticket Stubs circa 1993-2003

Unfortunately, the Star Wars tickets weren’t in the bunch, but I was still thrilled to find stubs for movies I saw almost twenty years ago when it only cost  $3.75 to see an afternoon movie and $6.50 for an evening show.  As I flipped through the stack, it was amazing to know all of my memories were still inside of me, waiting to be recalled.  I saw The Mirror Has Two Faces with my sister back in 1996. The film strip broke halfway through and we had to wait forever for them fix it so we could see the end.

Then, there are the ticket stubs from movies I saw with my first serious boyfriend, Braveheart, Beevis and Butthead Do America, and Twister. My best friend from high school and I went and saw The Lion King and The Hunchback of Notre Dame together. We were the only “adults” without children in the entire theater, but we watched like we were kids.

These little memories are just a fraction of what these stubs hold for me.  They are priceless and I am so thankful to have found them again.

My weird habit of saving ticket stubs continues to this day. I keep all my movie stubs on a giant bulletin board in my classroom. It has over 250 stubs from movies between 1991 and 2012, including the ticket stubs from my first date with my husband and the most recent movie we saw together (last month). My friends and family are all over this board!

Movie Ticket Stubs circa 1991-2012

Some other tickets I’ve saved over the years come from sporting events and concerts.  My surprise under-the-bed stash yielded concerts I went to in high school with my sister and best friend. We were psycho country fans, which makes the Ryman Auditorium ticket stub one of my favorites.  My dad took my sister and I to that historic stage. I’ll never forget the fun we had or the patience and kindness of my dad for letting two obsessed teenagers go nuts over our favorite celebrities.

Concert and Museum Stubs

What history and art dork wouldn’t save her museum tickets? Van Gogh Alive and the Phoenix Art Museum are fairly recent, but I remember them as being absolutely beautiful days filled with beautiful things.

While in high school, I had a best friend that was kind enough to invite me to a few awesome basketball games.  I still have every stub and I love the memories they bring of us laughing and having a great time.

Basketball, Baseball, and Football . . . Oh my!

This collection also includes a ticket stub for a hockey game (Milwaukee Admirals) that was my first ever date. Sometimes, I wonder how that guy is doing.  He was nice and we had fun, but it didn’t work out!  My baseball stubs remind me of more time spent with my step dad and my husband. I love both major and minor league baseball even if it means getting a sunburn out on the lawn seats. If I can’t have my Star Wars tickets, I can at least have these. The San Francisco Giants ticket was in the stash I thought I’d lost.

Aside from my movie stubs, my favorite ticket stubs are from NASCAR races. I am a huge fan of fast cars and Jeff Gordon, but even more so of spending time with my Dad and stepmom. Every year for almost 10 years, I’ve gone out to Indiana to visit them and catch the Brickyard 400. Whenever I see those tickets I think of our race traditions, the noise of the cars, the smell of rubber, and the rivalry of Jeff Gordon fans (me) and Dale Earnhardt Jr. fans, (my dad). NASCAR something we do together and it means a lot to me.  I keep these tickets on the wall behind my desk at work, so I can I have a little piece of my dad and stepmom with me every day.

NASCAR Ticket Stubs

Between the newer stacks of tickets and re-discovered treasures, I’ve taken on the project of organizing my stubs into a small scrapbook.  Clearly, I’m not the only one who saves these little mementos as I found a fantastic little binder made just for saving ticket stubs!

A scrapbook just for ticket stubs!

Silly as it may be, my ticket stubs are precious collectibles. Not only do they get me into movies, concerts, museums, and stadiums, but they are souvenirs to some of my favorite memories.

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c.b.w. 2012

The Converse Mentality

The Converse Cult has millions of members, but we all wear our shoes with the spice of individuality. No matter the color or style, these shoes will work for anyone who wants to embrace them. They have a distinctive voice and they expect the same of those who wear them.

The Converse brand has been around since 1908, but was relatively unknown until it started producing shoes for the athletic industry, most notably tennis (1915) and basketball (1917). In 1921, Chuck Taylor, a former basketball player started working for the company as a promoter, which eventually led to the shoes being referred to as “Chuckies” or Chucks.

An original 1917 Converse Shoe
Photo from mini smile

Up until 1966, Converse sneakers only produced one style of shoe, which was a basic white or black high-top. However, pressure from basketball teams forced the company to start producing sneakers in different colors.  Throughout the 1950s and 1960s, Converse celebrated and marketed its shoes as essential to the American image, most notably through high school and college athletes. It is in this era that Converse became an iconic brand. By the 1970s Converse started producing styles other than high tops that included knee highs and low cuts.

Modern Chuck Taylors or Chuckies
Photo courtesy of Wikipedia Commons

The 1970s also saw the company purchase the rights to a sneaker designed by Jack Purcell.  Originally created for the badminton court, the sneaker caught on with its slightly different style.  Purcell Sneakers differ from Chucks in that they have a thicker rubber toe with a distinctive “smiley face” design.

Purcell Sneakers
Photo courtesy of Wikipedia Commons

When I was about sixteen years old, I laced up my first pair of Converse sneakers and I never looked back.  They were a blue pair of Purcells and I wish I still had them! Almost twenty years later I’m still wearing Converse sneakers on a daily basis. These days, I prefer low-cuts in either the All-Star or One-Star variety.

At the moment, I own six pairs of Converse shoes in black, blue, green, gray, pink, and purple.  Like any good Converse devotee, I let the white rubber get scuffed up and I get ecstatic when the fabric around the seams begins to fray. I’ll only throw a pair away if there’s a hole in the sole, although I’ve been known to keep a hole-ridden pair of shoes for years. I’m in the middle of a new shoe revolution, which accounts for several pair looking so new.  No worries, though. I’ll have those things beat up in no time!

My current collection of Converse Sneakers
Photo by: c.b.w.

I am of the firm belief that this is a shoe that can be worn with anything from jeans to khakis to shorts and skirts. They never go out of style and they go with everything. Of course, not everyone agrees with me on this point. As a professional, I’ve had to defend my Converse Sneakers on a few occasions. The dress code at my job stipulates casual business attire as the accepted wardrobe of all employees, but I’m not very good at following that rule. I come to work each day wearing a pair of Converse sneakers that best matches whatever I’m wearing. Although, I’ve been known to purposely wear a clashing color.

Now, not everyone can get away with this and I don’t recommend trying it unless you have a quirky enough personality to pull it off.  I’m lucky in that I have a reputation of being the “weird one” and the strange girl no one can quite figure out.  Wearing sneakers is actually the most normal thing I do.

The Converse brand is more than just a swatch of canvas and white rubber in that these shoes embody the spirit of independence and endurance.  Whether it be basketball players, skateboarders, or funky history history teachers, we all wear our Converse sneakers with the same relentless sense of individualism.

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Sources:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Converse_(shoe_company)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack_Purcell

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c.b.w. 2012

Breaking The Stats Habit

It’s interesting how a number can influence so much.  For some, the number of birthdays they’ve had can lead to depression and for others the number on the inside of a waistband literally deflates all hope of retaining a drop of self-esteem.  The same is true for bloggers.  For the last few days my stats have been a little wonky and its driving my crazy.  This little bout of insanity has made me realize my confidence as a writer hinges entirely too much on one number.

The bar graph that threatens to define my worth.

I fully admit that I am a total stats addict.  The bar graph, sparkline, and full stats page are an intergral part of my life as I check them periodically throughout the day.  I make sure I have access to my stats via laptop, smartphone, and tablet, so no matter where I am I can check my numbers. Part of my obsession comes from pure habit, but the rest runs much deeper.  My inner critic likes to play with my confidence and she loves to cackle when the numbers are low.  The only relief I get from her is when the numbers are normal or keep climbing.

It’s ridiculous and I know it.

So, why do I allow one number to determine my worth?  Easy.  In this realm, higher numbers are equated with success. Interesting topics and high quality writing attract more readers, right?  More readers means I am a success.  This is the driving force behind checking those stats.  Like any writer, I crave the gratification that comes from knowing I’ve written something worthwhile.

As I said before, it’s ridiculous.

In order to put my focus back where it belongs – on writing and creating – I’m challenging myself to ignore my stats for a full week.  No numbers, charts, or averages are going to determine my level of success.  I am going to minimize the bar graph on my dashboard and abstain from visiting the full statistics page.  The sparkline is impossible to avoid, but luckily it doesn’t provide specific information.  In addition, I’ll be removing the WordPress app from my  Kindle Fire carousel. This week it’s all about writing and creating as well as I can without thinking about “the number.”

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If you’d like to join me on this challenge, sound off in the comments section!

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c.b.w.  2012

Penny Rugs: Boot Scrapers to Placemats

The penny rug has humble beginnings, but the beauty of this textile art has endured for more than 200 years.  Homemakers in the 1800s never let anything go to waste, so old clothing, hats, and blankets would be recycled into mats or rugs.  They would use coins as templates to make circles of different sizes, (hence the name “penny” rug) which were then sewn together in a variety of designs using a blanket stitch.  The name “penny rug” also has roots in the practice of sewing pennies inside the rug to make it lie flat.

19th Century Pennsylvania Penny Rug, Photo from J.Compton Gallery

Initially, penny rugs were used as door mats. Concentric circles were layered in stacks of three to give enough texture to clean the bottom of boots.  Burlap bags or feed sacks would also be reused to served as a backing to the rug to make it sturdy.

However, as time went by the penny rug evolved from a boot cleaner to a beautiful way to decorate the home.  Circle designs became more elaborate and were often fused with traditional folk art images, (i.e. quilt patterns, animals, trees, flowers, etc.).  Penny rugs got up off the floor and started adorning everything from tables, dressers, mantles, and even beds!

I started making penny rugs about six years ago.  They are a fantastic alternative to buying placemats that no one really likes and searching endlessly for a table runner that never truly fits the table!  In addition, penny rugs are a wonderful decorative touch for holidays and changing seasons.

Here are some of the penny rugs I’ve made over the years, (with exception to the 19th century Pennsylvania penny rug):

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While penny rugs look to be very intricate, most are actually very easy to make.  The most traditional layouts consist of nothing but circles, so the most difficult part of the entire process is deciding what colors to use.  Thick wools and flannels come in a variety of colors and patterns.  Raid the closet for fabric scraps or visit a local fabric store for a wide selection of wool felt.

The tradition continues to evolve as penny rugs now come in a wide variety of shapes, colors, and patterns.  Modern motifs and folk art mainstays combine seamlessly with the classic penny design. Get those needles out and start stitching!

Penny Rug Wisdom:

• When using felt, be sure to use 100% wool, (or at least a 70/30 blend).  The acrylic stuff warps easily and pills, while the real thing is incredibly sturdy. Besides that, wool felt has a more traditional look that befits a penny rug.
• DMC Pearl Cotton #3 is an ideal thread to use for stitching.  It’s thick without being chunky and strong enough to handle the weight of wool felt.  When working with smaller pieces, use 2 strands of DMC embroidery thread.
• Tapestry needles are perfect for wool appliqué.
• The only stitch you’ll truly ever need is the blanket stitch. I love this stitch because it’s simple and it hides little mistakes.  Stitch School has a great tutorial on a blanket stitch, here.
• Always work in layers.  Complete the rug one layer at a time in a way that allows stitches to be hidden and protected by subsequent layers.
• Always put a backing on a finished piece!  It makes the penny rug more stable and it protects/hides all knots and stitches under the design.
• Use a tiny dot of Aleene’s craft glue to hold a piece in place prior to stitching. This may sound like cheating to some, but I’ve found it be a lifesaver when laying out pieces. Trust me, it works!
• The best way to transfer a pattern to wool is to use freezer paper that has one side coated with plastic. Trace every piece of the pattern (if the pattern calls for 26 circles, trace 26 separate circles).  Cut out the pattern pieces and lay them on the wool plastic side down.  Press them down with a hot, dry iron until all edges are completely bonded.  This makes it so much easier to cut out each piece without the pattern slipping.  The freezer paper will peel right off when no longer needed.
• There’s no such thing as making too many penny rugs!

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c.b.w. 2012